BITESIZE #6 | Kelly Jones: Don’t miss the moments right in front of you

Your response to the bitesize episodes has been incredible and we’re so pleased you're getting so much from our mini hits of inspiration! 

Today’s clip comes from songwriter Kelly Jones and his regret at losing years of his life not being present. 

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## Podcast Episode Summary: Kelly Jones on Regretting Lost Years Due to Not Being Present

**Episode Overview:**

The podcast features a candid conversation with renowned singer-songwriter Kelly Jones from the band Stereophonics. Kelly opens up about his regrets over the years he lost due to not being fully present in the moment, emphasizing the importance of living in the present and embracing both the joys and challenges of life.

**Key Points:**

* **Lost Years of Regret:** Kelly expresses his remorse for the years he spent worrying and not being present in the moment. He acknowledges that his preoccupation with negative thoughts led him down paths that resulted in losing precious time.

* **Occupational Hazard:** Kelly highlights the unique challenges faced by musicians, as their profession often takes them to places that can inspire creativity but may also lead to missing significant moments in their personal lives.

* **Iceberg Metaphor:** The host, Jason Vale, draws a parallel between Kelly's experiences and the iceberg metaphor, emphasizing that people often only see the visible successes of individuals while overlooking the struggles and setbacks that lie beneath the surface.

* **Survivorship Bias:** The host addresses the misconception that successful people have all the answers, emphasizing that the podcast aims to showcase the full spectrum of human experiences, including failures and setbacks, to provide a more realistic perspective.

* **Social Media's Impact:** The host and Kelly discuss the negative effects of social media, particularly the tendency to present an edited version of one's life, leading to a distorted perception of reality and fostering feelings of inadequacy.

* **Normalizing Setbacks:** The host reassures listeners that setbacks and failures are a normal part of life, and expecting them can help individuals cope better when they arise.

* **Success Isn't Linear:** The host cites examples of other podcast guests who have shared their stories of setbacks and failures, highlighting that success rarely follows a straight path.

* **Embracing the Journey:** The host encourages listeners to view setbacks as part of the journey rather than something to be feared, emphasizing that these moments indicate progress and growth.

**Conclusion:**

The podcast concludes with a reminder to appreciate the present moment and to embrace both the positive and negative aspects of life. The host expresses gratitude to listeners for sharing the podcast and encourages them to continue spreading its positive message.

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[02:08.680 -> 02:10.860] Hi there, welcome along to this bite-sized episode
[02:10.860 -> 02:12.520] of the High Performance Podcast.
[02:12.520 -> 02:13.860] We just thought it was useful for you
[02:13.860 -> 02:16.560] to have a short, sharp episode once a week,
[02:16.560 -> 02:18.160] just to give you a little bit of a lift,
[02:18.160 -> 02:19.320] a bit of an energy boost,
[02:19.320 -> 02:21.680] a bit of education into the lives of some other people
[02:21.680 -> 02:22.960] without you needing to listen
[02:22.960 -> 02:28.120] to a full hour-long extended episode. Of course the podcasts are all there for you so
[02:28.120 -> 02:31.600] wherever you get your pods feel free to go right back to the very beginning of
[02:31.600 -> 02:36.480] the very first series with Rio Ferdinand that was our very first episode and
[02:36.480 -> 02:40.520] you'll find different people talking about different themes with different
[02:40.520 -> 02:44.440] lessons for your life and the man we're going to hear from today on this short
[02:44.440 -> 02:46.160] episode of the podcast
[02:46.160 -> 02:48.960] is someone who came on, spoke so vulnerably,
[02:48.960 -> 02:52.960] so honestly, and changed people's opinions of him.
[02:52.960 -> 02:55.600] It's Kelly Jones from the Stereophonics.
[02:57.960 -> 02:59.320] I think I've lost years.
[02:59.320 -> 03:00.160] Do you?
[03:00.160 -> 03:01.000] Yeah, absolutely, yeah.
[03:01.000 -> 03:04.480] I've lost years worrying and not being present in the room.
[03:04.480 -> 03:14.200] And my head has took me down so many were moles in my life that i've lost so much time from doing it and that's one thing i'd like in the future i'd never want to continue to do.
[03:14.580 -> 03:23.860] It's an occupational hazard in some ways because the places you go to brings out some gold sometimes but unfortunately you can miss moments in your life that are right in front of you.
[03:23.680 -> 03:25.680] But unfortunately, you can miss moments in your life that are right in front of you. Jason Vale We spoke in that podcast,
[03:25.680 -> 03:30.640] Damien, about being an iceberg and people only seeing one part of someone's life. And I think
[03:30.640 -> 03:36.160] this is the really, really important point for me on the High Performance podcast. I sometimes hear
[03:36.160 -> 03:40.880] from people who I assume haven't listened to these pods saying to me, Oh, yeah, you're just talking
[03:40.880 -> 03:45.240] to successful people. So there's survivorship bias. They've all been successful
[03:45.240 -> 03:48.680] so they think they have all the answers or I don't want to just listen to
[03:49.080 -> 03:54.120] Successful people and the great things that's happened in their life because it makes me feel inferior about my life
[03:54.320 -> 03:58.800] The reality is as we found with Kelly Jones and we sat there for a good hour and a half with him
[03:58.880 -> 04:05.520] We speak as much about the struggles and the failures and the setbacks and the full stops or the commas in life Because they teach us so much about the good stuff about the successes am y strydion a'r ffailiau a'r ymdrechion a'r cyflawniau cyflawniol neu'r commae yn byw
[04:05.520 -> 04:08.480] oherwydd maen nhw'n dysgu llawer am y pethau da am y cyflwynoedd.
[04:08.480 -> 04:13.200] Yn siŵr, mae yna ddynion sy'n cael eu cyfathrebu gan y ffysiologwyr yn y gynulliad
[04:13.200 -> 04:16.640] o'r enw Daniel Kahneman Jake sy'n cael ei gyfathrebu fel y ddrawer cyfan.
[04:16.640 -> 04:20.800] Mae'n edrych arno pan rydyn ni'n meddwl am bobl, beth ydyn ni'n cofio amdanyn nhw
[04:20.800 -> 04:23.760] ac yr hyn y mae'r dyddiadur yn ei ddweud yw, mae tri pethau, rydyn ni'n cofio pan fyddwn ni'n cyntaf
[04:23.760 -> 04:29.840] wedi cael nhw, felly pan fyddwn ni'n gallu clywed Kelly Jones ar y stereofoniaeth ar gyfer y cyfan gyntaf, y record diwethaf rydyn ni'n clywed
[04:29.840 -> 04:34.960] o nhw, ond y peth rydyn ni'n cofio'n fwyaf yw sut maen nhw'n delio gyda'u holl ffyrdd gwych neu'u pwysau momentau,
[04:34.960 -> 04:40.000] ac rwy'n credu bod hyn wedi bod yn ddiddorol ar y podcast, fod pobl eisiau cofio eu bywydau eu hunain
[04:40.000 -> 04:45.840] drwy siarad am y cyfleu, y diflodiau, eu eu momenau gorau, oherwydd yw'r momenau y
[04:45.840 -> 04:50.800] ddynt wedi ddod allan am beth am eu perthynas eu hunain, a ddynt wedi dysgu amdanynt, a gallant
[04:50.800 -> 04:56.320] ymdrech a throi gyda phobl eraill. Ac rwy'n credu y byddai pobl wedi clywed Kelly yn siarad yno am
[04:56.320 -> 04:59.840] efallai rhai o'r diflodiau a oedd yn eu cael pan oedd yn cael eu gweithredu i
[05:00.560 -> 05:07.480] gael ei llys ymhellach, neu pan oedd ei flwyddo yn ymwneud â'i son, neu efallai y momenau, fel y dweud, save his voice box or when his son transitioned or even those moments like
[05:07.480 -> 05:12.120] he says of going down those wormholes of worry are actually moments where he
[05:12.120 -> 05:16.120] found out an awful lot about his own character his own resilience and his own
[05:16.120 -> 05:21.800] great characteristics. And I think we live in a world now Damien where we're
[05:21.800 -> 05:27.720] constantly seeing the edited version of other people's lives so actually actually we're looking at someone like Kelly Jones, we're seeing
[05:27.720 -> 05:30.920] him on stage singing a song, we're watching him spray champagne everywhere
[05:30.920 -> 05:34.600] when he gets a number one record, we're seeing sports people do brilliant
[05:34.600 -> 05:38.120] things, we're seeing our friends and our family living what looks like the
[05:38.120 -> 05:42.200] perfect life when we only take a look at their curated Instagram feeds. I think
[05:42.200 -> 05:44.840] it's so important to have these conversations where we say yeah, you know
[05:44.840 -> 05:48.960] what, it's crap for all of us at times. We all have the struggles and the setbacks
[05:48.960 -> 05:54.480] and I don't know. I really think that in years to come we're going to reflect on this period where
[05:54.480 -> 05:58.080] we're all editing our lives for other people to think that they're great and I think we are going
[05:58.080 -> 06:02.800] to regret what we're doing to each other and what we're doing to our kids. Absolutely we are. There's
[06:02.800 -> 06:07.920] been studies on this about what social media does to us and there's three factors that tends to beth rydym yn ei wneud i'n plentyn. Yn siŵr, rydyn ni. Mae yna studio ar hyn o bryd o ran beth mae cymdeithasol yn ei wneud i ni, ac mae tri ffactorau sy'n
[06:07.920 -> 06:11.680] teimlo i ni. Yr un o'r rhai, yw ei fod yn polirio pethau i mewn i ddwy
[06:11.680 -> 06:28.480] camau, iawn ynglyn â'r ddau, iawn ynglyn â'r ddau. Pan fyddwn ni'n gwybod bod yna ffyrdd o ffodol, byddwn ni'n ymwneud â hyn fel ffaith bod ni ddim yn ddodfodol, yn hytrach na'i weld fel
[06:28.480 -> 06:33.520] emociyn teimlo. Ac mae'r peth cymaint mae'n ei wneud yw ei fod yn ein ymwneud â chambyrau
[06:33.520 -> 06:38.320] echo o bobl sy'n rhoi ein penderfyniad ein hunain i ni unig, felly dydyn ni ddim yn clywed unrhyw beth
[06:38.320 -> 06:44.160] yn ymgynghori, felly dydyn ni ddim yn clywed y strydion yng nghanol, y difloddau, nid yw unrhyw un yn rhedeg
[06:44.160 -> 06:48.960] eu momenau lle maen nhw wedi eu rhoi ar y ddŵr. Felly rydych chi'n iawn iawn, rwy'n credu
[06:48.960 -> 07:08.800] pan gallwn ddod allan o hynny a chroesawu i'r podcast y bobl sy'n ddweud am y ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd o'r ffyrdd us all feel reassured that we're not weird, we're not the unusual ones. It's actually entirely normal. Reassured I think is such a good word, you know, let's
[07:08.800 -> 07:13.440] talk about Dina Asher Smith and Sean Dyche and Frank Lampard and Clive
[07:13.440 -> 07:17.180] Woodward and Johnny Wilkinson and Sia Khaleesi and Sean Wayne and Tyrone
[07:17.180 -> 07:21.420] Mings and many many other guests that we could mention. In fact probably every
[07:21.420 -> 07:24.340] guest that we can mention on the High Performance Podcast, every single one of
[07:24.340 -> 07:28.080] them Damien has come on here and said right. This is my story. This is the good stuff
[07:28.080 -> 07:31.100] But here's the failures is the struggles. Here's the hard moments, right?
[07:31.240 -> 07:36.160] So if every single one of them has had a setback or a failure
[07:36.360 -> 07:41.420] maybe we should live a life where we're expecting at some time to have a setback or a failure because
[07:41.800 -> 07:45.160] If we don't expect it, it'll derail us. If we expect that it's
[07:45.160 -> 07:48.840] down the road somewhere, I think we're better equipped to deal with it when it arrives.
[07:48.840 -> 07:52.640] Definitely. You know, Clive Woodward told us that success doesn't happen in straight
[07:52.640 -> 07:58.520] lines. It's always bumpy, it's always winding, there's always moments where it bends back
[07:58.520 -> 08:03.960] on itself. And I think when we understand that those curves, those bumpy moments are
[08:03.960 -> 08:09.000] actually part of the journey rather than something to be feared, they should be embraced and
[08:09.000 -> 08:13.600] welcomed because there's a sign that we're living and that progress is
[08:13.600 -> 08:17.800] happening. Love it. Damien, listen, thank you so much once again for your hard
[08:17.800 -> 08:22.480] work on the podcast, not just today but on every episode. Thank you as well.
[08:22.480 -> 08:25.600] Thank you so much, not just for listening to these podcasts,
[08:25.600 -> 08:29.280] and I'm delighted you are listening to them, and I'm delighted they're having an important and
[08:29.280 -> 08:34.480] positive impact in your life, but also for sharing them, for shouting out. I often say to people,
[08:34.480 -> 08:39.760] you know, you don't know whose life you might impact for good by just saying, listen, there's
[08:39.760 -> 08:47.720] a podcast out there which is spreading a positive message, it out so if you can share it across your socials it means the world to us you can also find
[08:47.720 -> 08:52.280] us on instagram at liquid thinker is Damien I'm at jay comfrey you can find
[08:52.280 -> 08:55.960] the podcast at high performance we're on YouTube as well where you can watch
[08:55.960 -> 08:59.960] extended episodes but please keep on coming back for more inspiration from
[08:59.960 -> 09:03.880] the podcast we're not going anywhere and we've got big plans thanks very much to
[09:03.880 -> 09:05.160] Lotus cars for their continued
[09:05.160 -> 09:08.280] support. Thank you to the whole team for their hard work on this
[09:08.280 -> 09:11.160] bite sized episode of the high performance podcast. And we'll
[09:11.160 -> 09:13.200] see you for more very soon. Bye bye.
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